DPP: Expectations

[scifishipper.livejournal.com]

Today, a discussion about what we expect in pilots fanfic and how we characterize the "fixes" to pilot problems. Like everyone, I've read a lot of k/l fanfic that moves their relationship to a better place using some similar tropes. One of those tropes is that Lee changes to be more patient and trusting and uses the "drip-drip-drip" approach to getting Kara to trust him. Given the prevalence of this trope, I'd like to ask you all a question that someone once asked me:

Do we expect too much of Lee?

In other words, do we expect him to be endlessly patient and accepting and willing to wait Kara out on her fears? If so, why? Secondarily, if we do, is that fair?

Additionally, if their genders were reversed, would we expect Lee to wait for Kara in the same way or would we consider that unfitting or stereotypical for a woman to wait for a man to sort out his issues?

I have a lot of "maybe??" responses to these and can see the answers being quite fic/situation specific, but I thought I'd throw it out there.

In giving your thoughts about the idea, consider your OWN expectations and then consider the body of work in the BSG fandom: Does it uphold the expectation that it is Lee who changes to make their relationship work? Also, if you are a writer, what other ways have you "fixed" their relationship to make it work?

This question is in no way designed to judge any character or opinion that anyone has. I expect everyone will be kind and thoughtful in their responses. Thanks!

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WISHING WELL UPDATE:

WISHES FULFILLED!
Wish granted for sci_fi_shipper: Scar and EoJ icons (shareable) by kl_shipper1.

UNCLAIMED WISHES
We have many pilots shippers whose wishes have not been claimed! Here is a list of the wishes requested. (I've summarized the longer ones, so please check the link for specifics.)

Wish for "Crack!vid of LMFAO’s ‘Sexy And I Know It’ starring one, Leland Adama" HERE.

Wish for "Humor piece from Kara’s POV post-poof as she watches life on Earth go on without her" HERE.

Wish for "pretty, colorful cool Kara-centric icons" HERE.

Wish for "pre-mini ficlet featuring Kara, Lee, and Karl" HERE.

Wish for fic of Zak realizing Kara and Lee have feelings for each other and doing something about it HERE.

Wish for "ficlet about Kara and Lee when they've grown old" HERE.

Wish for "fic about Lee learning the origin of Kara's callsign" HERE.

Wish for "Kara finds out Lee's marrying Dee and it's enough of a shock to make her try to interfere" HERE.

Wish for "a BSG vid to the song Unsettled Scores" HERE.

Wish for "post-canon Kara/Lee + Bill/Saul family fic" HERE.

Comments

[onlyariana.livejournal.com]

Well I think canon shows us that Sam was accepting of it. Maybe he didn't like it but he lived with it. We're not sure about very many things with Zak but I feel like the table tells us that Kara was having some trouble with being monogamous while she was with Zak. I tend toward the feeling that even if Zak was like Sam and accepted her having other lovers he wouldn't have been ok with her sleeping with his brother. That's just something that is likely to bring up decades worth of sibling rivalry.

I do tend to fixate on how the characters were early on. I think that even if they both changed a great deal they'd both still lean toward those same issues. When the going got really tough, even 2, 5, 15 years down the road I think Lee would tend toward pushing down the unpleasantness and those targeted one liners. Kara would want to lash out and run away. But maybe the lack of belief in their ability to change is more about my issues than theirs. ;-)

I love the happy ever after fics. I soooo want them to be happy and healthy and in love. But if I was looking at them as two real life people I knew I'd probably be skeptical that they could ever make it work.

[callmeonetrack.livejournal.com]

if I was looking at them as two real life people I knew I'd probably be skeptical that they could ever make it work.

Yeah, I'm very much of the opposite thinking, where they're never going to work any other way but together. ;) I think they learn to bring out the best in each other on all levels over the course of the series.

[winegums.livejournal.com]

I don't know if Sam was really, at the heart of it, so accepting either - he does bring some major jealousy to the table when presented with the target (Lee in EoJ, Leoben on the Demetrius), but I find it interesting that it's Lee he chooses to focus his anger on and not Kara, who is the person he's actually in a relationship with and who's cheating on him.

I actually know two real-life people who have been like Lee and Kara for over a decade, and as their friend, it hurts to see them sometimes - they literally just keep missing each other, but in his words, it's like solar flares when they are in the same room (this has persisted through long separations and relationships with other people). I certainly believe they could make it work, but imo they're really too scared to right now.

Sorry for the late reply, but I've been off all week and am just coming to the DPPs now.