I hope I'm not violating the spirit of the prompt by giving a long excerpt here, but it's just so lovely, it's my very favorite among the Zak POVs on Lee and Kara. It's from spamdilemma's wonderful Tomorrow's dust (flares into breath) (http://community.livejournal.com/bsg2003fics/285532.html), and I can't recommend it enough -- the story as a whole is a concise, masterful examination of the complicated Adama family dynamics; a subtle character study in the way they love.
~~
You're twenty and Lee's twenty-four and you're out with Kara, out in the open. She's with you, beside you in a small booth opposite Lee, and her hand in yours has never felt anything but right until you look across at Lee looking at Kara looking at him.
You know your brother. You know him. And that look on his face, once you cut it down and cut it down again, there's love written all over.
And as much as you know your brother, he knows you tenfold. So when you duck out under the pretense for fresh air and a dirty smoke, he follows, and this only incenses you more.
"Hey," he tries, but you're having nothing of it.
"How long? Since I started going out with her, or before?"
Lee sighs, and there's a "before" in it, though you can't process that just yet. "Zak, there's nothing there and never has been. You don't have to worry."
"Oh, I'm not worried," you spit out. "I am pissed that you said nothing before now."
"I told you, there's nothing to tell!" And now he's angry, and you can't help but feel glad for it. "It's better that it's you, anyway," Lee says.
You look unseeingly at him. "What the frak does that even mean? You don't assign who you do or do not love, and Kara -"
"She doesn't!" Lee flares up again. "And I could never give her that, like you can."
"It's not so hard, Lee," you say after a moment. "You got to give up something of yourself sooner or later."
He gives you a smile, too wry, but exactly Lee. "I suppose it has to be later."
"Lee, could you just - I need you to be okay with this."
"I am," Lee stresses. "But you don't need my stamp of approval."
"Shut up," you say, "I need yours most of all."
Kara's chosen you, and maybe it makes you a lesser person to value her love more knowing how your brother feels - and refuses to feel. But perhaps it makes you a better person too, when that sense of triumph you thought might take over, does not. There's no winner, nor should there be.
It makes a weird sort of sense, in your mind. You've loved the same people all your lives, why should it be so different here? Lee loves first and you follow.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2010-08-20 03:31 pm (UTC)~~
You're twenty and Lee's twenty-four and you're out with Kara, out in the open. She's with you, beside you in a small booth opposite Lee, and her hand in yours has never felt anything but right until you look across at Lee looking at Kara looking at him.
You know your brother. You know him. And that look on his face, once you cut it down and cut it down again, there's love written all over.
And as much as you know your brother, he knows you tenfold. So when you duck out under the pretense for fresh air and a dirty smoke, he follows, and this only incenses you more.
"Hey," he tries, but you're having nothing of it.
"How long? Since I started going out with her, or before?"
Lee sighs, and there's a "before" in it, though you can't process that just yet. "Zak, there's nothing there and never has been. You don't have to worry."
"Oh, I'm not worried," you spit out. "I am pissed that you said nothing before now."
"I told you, there's nothing to tell!" And now he's angry, and you can't help but feel glad for it. "It's better that it's you, anyway," Lee says.
You look unseeingly at him. "What the frak does that even mean? You don't assign who you do or do not love, and Kara -"
"She doesn't!" Lee flares up again. "And I could never give her that, like you can."
"It's not so hard, Lee," you say after a moment. "You got to give up something of yourself sooner or later."
He gives you a smile, too wry, but exactly Lee. "I suppose it has to be later."
"Lee, could you just - I need you to be okay with this."
"I am," Lee stresses. "But you don't need my stamp of approval."
"Shut up," you say, "I need yours most of all."
Kara's chosen you, and maybe it makes you a lesser person to value her love more knowing how your brother feels - and refuses to feel. But perhaps it makes you a better person too, when that sense of triumph you thought might take over, does not. There's no winner, nor should there be.
It makes a weird sort of sense, in your mind. You've loved the same people all your lives, why should it be so different here? Lee loves first and you follow.