DPP: Expectations

[scifishipper.livejournal.com]

Today, a discussion about what we expect in pilots fanfic and how we characterize the "fixes" to pilot problems. Like everyone, I've read a lot of k/l fanfic that moves their relationship to a better place using some similar tropes. One of those tropes is that Lee changes to be more patient and trusting and uses the "drip-drip-drip" approach to getting Kara to trust him. Given the prevalence of this trope, I'd like to ask you all a question that someone once asked me:

Do we expect too much of Lee?

In other words, do we expect him to be endlessly patient and accepting and willing to wait Kara out on her fears? If so, why? Secondarily, if we do, is that fair?

Additionally, if their genders were reversed, would we expect Lee to wait for Kara in the same way or would we consider that unfitting or stereotypical for a woman to wait for a man to sort out his issues?

I have a lot of "maybe??" responses to these and can see the answers being quite fic/situation specific, but I thought I'd throw it out there.

In giving your thoughts about the idea, consider your OWN expectations and then consider the body of work in the BSG fandom: Does it uphold the expectation that it is Lee who changes to make their relationship work? Also, if you are a writer, what other ways have you "fixed" their relationship to make it work?

This question is in no way designed to judge any character or opinion that anyone has. I expect everyone will be kind and thoughtful in their responses. Thanks!

( Our Wishing Well has MANY unclaimed wishes! Won't you grant a wish??? )